Summer breakups can be the final straw for couples who have been on the verge of splitting or for those who didn’t see it coming. The eagerly awaited summer break, anticipated all year, often exacerbates accumulated tensions, the pressure for perfect vacations, and constant togetherness, contributing to this frequently overlooked marital issue.
10%. Aside from being the title of a famous TV series, this figure also represents a less joyful reality: the percentage of couples who separate and/or divorce right after vacations.
As revealed by a 2016 study published by the British newspaper Daily Mail, vacations are not always synonymous with relaxation and marital harmony. On the contrary, for one in ten couples, holidays end with a definitive breakup.
In the United States, another sociological study conducted by the University of Washington highlighted two significant peaks in divorce filings in March and August, coinciding with the post-winter and summer vacation periods. This trend suggests a complex—if not paradoxical—relationship between taking a professional break and marital happiness.
Why is it that this sacred time, supposedly meant to strengthen the bond between partners, sometimes also marks its end?
Vacations as a Catalyst for Accumulated Tensions
Couple difficulties often linger for months, even years… The decision to break up doesn’t just appear suddenly during vacations.
Vacations simply allow people to step back, observe each other’s behaviour, and reflect on the future. The time spent together, without daily distractions, tends to highlight pre-existing cracks in the relationship.
“I had been thinking about leaving my husband for months, but I always found a good reason to postpone my decision. I felt it was never the right time—too much work at the office, our daughters were too young, our apartment had just been renovated,” recalls Sofia, 39. “Then one morning, very calmly, I realised as I watched the three of them playing in the pool that there would never be a perfect moment.”
It was when I saw him take a so-called professional call while we were bringing out our youngest son’s birthday cake that I had the realisation: he will never change.
For couples already on shaky ground, the expectations placed on these few weeks of rest often prove to be too high, as they are typically seen as the “last chance summer holidays” by those who have already considered leaving their partner.
However, when reality falls short of expectations, this idealised period can become the turning point for an irreversible breakup. “It was when I saw him take a supposedly professional call while we were bringing out our youngest son’s birthday cake that it hit me: he would never change, and his work would always come before me, before his family,” recalls Marylin, 44, with bitterness.
The Pressure of Perfect Vacations (and a Perfect Return)
Behind the hope that a few weeks away from the daily grind will “do us a world of good,” lies the myth of the ideal vacation—a concept increasingly promoted by a leisure-oriented society—that adds extra pressure to couples already facing difficulties.
This time is seen as a sacred pause, a moment to recharge after a year of hard work. However, we now understand that it’s far from enough to truly rest, especially since vacations often bring additional stress, with activities to organise, meals to plan, and compromises to make between everyone’s tastes and desires.
For many couples, vacations resemble a test of endurance rather than a magical break, intensifying incompatibilities instead of soothing them. According to the same Daily Mail study, 40% of couples argue nearly once a day during vacations, and 24% of these disputes occur within the first 24 hours of the trip.
Similarly, the return to daily life—synonymous with change and new beginnings—has almost become an obligation to make decisions, much like New Year’s resolutions. The start of the school year often signifies a new cycle and a fresh beginning for individuals and families. While this sense of renewal is mostly superficial and tied to the calendar, it can prompt some struggling couples to make decisive and sometimes drastic changes in their relationships.